©Alicia Dara 9/21/2022
Last spring I worked with a talented Power Voice client I’ll call Janet*, who is almost 6’ tall, with short brown hair and big red glasses. She was struggling with a huge confidence issue that had plagued her during her whole career, and wanted help with finding her Power Voice so she could finally overcome it, and start advocating for herself at work.
Janet started her career when she was just 18 years old, fresh out of high school. She worked as a personal assistant for a rising Hollywood movie star, who was messy and disorganized. Among other tasks, Janet’s job included things like fetching dry cleaning, walking the star’s two tiny dogs, and organizing the many faxes (it was the 00s!) that arrived in the star’s home office. She also had to arrange her boss’ many lunch meetings, and all the restaurant reservations. Her mandate was to secure a table that would face the door, so everyone entering would see that the star was dining there and (hopefully) badger her for an autograph or picture.
The job was demanding, with very long hours, but Janet was determined to succeed. She had only recently gotten her driver’s license, but she learned to navigate the wild streets of LA. She had never seen a fax machine before, but she studied the manual until she knew it so well that she could fix it when it broke down. She had never even booked her own dentist appointments (her mom had always done it), but she learned how to interact with customer service people and formed a good network of relationships.
Eventually Janet got a great recommendation from the movie star, and through her new Hollywood network she found a job as a Production Assistant on the set of a big TV show. She had a whole list of brand-new tasks to accomplish, machines to learn, and people to charm, and she threw herself into it, eventually securing another great recommendation. From there she became studio manager for a Disney animator, where once again she had to learn a ton of new skills, including managing the 50-person staff and coordinating all her boss' public appearances and press statements. She learned how to use a computer and cell phone, and even figured out how to work the clunky office espresso machine, all of which got her another stellar recommendation for her next position.
By the time Janet came to see me for some private coaching, she was 8 years into her career as a Line Producer for a major gaming studio. An LP is a high-level project manager who has to oversee all aspects of game development, and keep many wheels in motion (I had already given some group Power Voice trainings in their office, and I saw Janet in action with my own eyes). Her job was more demanding than any of her past roles, and although she had just won an MVP award at the company’s annual gala event, she was constantly living in fear that she would be fired. She wouldn’t even take more than a few vacation days a year, for fear of being seen as a non-committed slacker who should be tossed out.
It took me a bit to understand where Janet’s lack of confidence was coming from. During our Power Voice sessions I coached her on the Four Pillars of Public Speaking, so she could speak confidently when she had to make announcements to the entire office and give work presentations to senior leadership. I taught her the Power Pyramid communication style, so she could answer confidently when they asked her questions about her work. I also taught her some important Power Communication skills, so she could advocate confidently when speaking to potential partners, clients, and staff. During one of our sessions when I checked in to see how all of this was affecting her mindset, Janet told me the same thing: “I just keep thinking that I’m not good enough to be in this role. I must have massive impostor syndrome!”.
That’s when I figured out the problem.
Janet is not an impostor. She is, however, someone who was a beginner at almost every single job she ever had. Unlike some other professions, which can require years of schooling and training before you can enter them, Janet had to learn every single one of her roles on the job, making tons of mistakes and dealing with demanding bosses at every stage. She’d had no mentors or role models to help her. She simply put her head down and worked her way through whatever was in front of her. And each time she jumped to a new role, she’d start all over again.
An entire cultural dialogue, if not an industry, has sprung up around this issue. As I’ve said many times in interviews, I don’t believe in pathologizing women’s impostor syndrome. Turning it into yet another problem that women have to “fix” in ourselves takes focus away from the many discriminatory systems that make women feel like workplace impostors in the first place. Women of color and queer women are especially vulnerable to feelings of impostor syndrome, because they exist at the intersection of several different kinds of discrimination (sexism, racism and homophobia). But again: women aren’t broken, the systems around us are broken. Women feel less like impostors in workplaces where things like salary parity, gender and racial equity, paid parental leave, paid time off for family caregiving, and comprehensive health insurance are securely in place.
That said, the effects of impostor syndrome can feel very real, and many of my clients need help shifting their focus away from fixing what's broken, (which is a toxic mindset) and toward recognizing what's working. In Janet’s case, the constant feeling of being a beginner had kept her from being able to recognize the huge amount of skills, knowledge, wisdom and experience she had acquired. We went back over each job and made a long list, and once she saw it all gathered together, something began to shift. We created some Power Language around her abilities, so she could clearly articulate them whenever she needed to. At her next work presentation, Janet used her new Power Language to reveal a brand-new office-wide organization system that she had created, and blew her boss away. He was so impressed that he even gave her a budget to hire her own assistant for the project! They worked together and completed it in record time.
I just got an email from Janet. All it contained was a picture of her sitting at Cafe Flore in Paris, biting into the biggest chocolate croissant I’ve ever seen, and the words, “Me for the next 2 weeks!”. Happy vacation, girl. You deserve it!
There are several ways I can help you find your Power Voice. My next 90-minute group Zoom training is Wednesday, October 19th at 4:30pm PDT.
For private sessions, email me directly for rates and availability. Looking forward to working with you!